How
drug's consumed my life
This
is one man's story
My
name is Phil and I am 32 years old, I was diagnosed as having Attention
deficit disorder and Dyslexia a few years ago, I have done
a lot of thinking since then.
When I push the rewind button on my life it all becomes much
clearer. As a child at school I would watch my classmates writing in
their schoolbooks and think to myself " why do I feel so different".
I would look down at the empty page and wonder, what I was supposed
to be doing. I would then get told off for not listening or doing
any work told to sit still and stop fidgeting.
Secondary school was even worse, lots of different classroom, teachers,
having to remember what lesson I had next, taking the right books, pens
and remembering p.e. Kits etc. was all beyond me. I felt nobody know
what I was feeling in side.
I
become the class clown, good for a laugh. It was all a big
cover up for the way I was feeling. I was 13 years old and could
barely read or write, I could not even get the hang of the 24
hour clock and did not understand most of the math's techniques
used, I new that I was not stupid if any thing I was cleverer
then most in many way's. I'd play up in class and get thrown-out
in order to avoid having to read.
I
would wag the lessons I found most difficult, "I hated school
and couldn't wait to leave ".
I was always in trouble and got the blame for everything whether it
was me or not, my nickname was the trouble magnet. I eventually
left school and thought it would be great, little did I know that
things would become much worse.
I
constantly felt bored with every thing I did, I always felt like
a caged lion pacing a round not able to get satisfaction or contentment
from anything. I never felt relaxed, I would flit from job-to-job because
I'd get bored or get the sack anyway, time past and I ended up one the
dole.
I
met some new mates how invited me round to there gaff, when I got there
they were all smoking a draw and offered me some, so I tried
it, it was a wicked feeling, the discontentment and boredom was gone.
OK, at first it made me as sick as a dog, but I could still feel the
effects.
I
couldn't believe it I could sit and watch a film, have a deep conversation
without getting bored and best of all I could chill-out and relax for
the first time in my life.
Years
past still on the draw I now lived with my girlfriend and my 5-year-old
child. If I had a job to go to and felt a bit rough from being stoned
the night before I'd nick a wiz to get me through the day. Life for
me and my girlfriend felt so down we'd even spent our child's birthday
money on drugs.
The
house was full of people smoking bong's and joints, are home
was no fit place for a child. We had no patience or time for
the child; we were to busy getting stoned.
The relationship between my partner and me had been over for a few years,
I knew the only way to give-up the draw and wiz was to leave,
so I did.
I
want to live at my parent's house; it was pretty lonely, as my social
life was gone. My ex mates were still draw-hands and weren't interested
in me, as I was now a straight- head. Months of depression past,
I was completely free of the need of a joint or a wiz.
I
got a job and life was sweet. I eventually met a woman who fully understood
me, we were best friends. Life was great and my new girlfriend taught
me to read and write she got me an appointment to see a psychiatrist
because I was so hyperactive with concentration and impulse difficulties.
Adult ADHD
The psychiatrist diagnosed me as having A.D.H.D AND DYSLEXIA I
felt I had the answer for a lot of my difficulties.
After
several appointments I stared on medication (DEXANPHETAMINE) which worked
well until I felt a bit low and decided I would take a few more that
day, before I new it I was taking them like smarties.
To
me it felt like taking a wiz again, before I new it I was taking
wiz and smoking a draw. I felt my life had spiraled out of
control. My girlfriend tried to help me but I felt I could not help
myself and she left.
My
life at that time was hell-on-earth I had nothing, no house
.No money, no possessions as I had sold all my descent stuff to
get a draw or wiz. I went as far as turning to crime and ended
up inside. After serving my time I rejoined the world. I no longer use
drugs and life continues with its ups and downs. I've lost my girlfriend
although she still gives me support.
I
feel I've finally seen a light at the end of the tunnel, I've taken
my time to get there, but I have really learnt by my mistakes. I decided
to get professional help through coaching and learn to manage and except
my A.D.H.D. Medication is not for me.
Info
on Adult Coaching
I
would like to say to anyone who can relate to my life, " I wish
you all the very best with your future", if you have are reading
this story now I know you will receive the best help and support you
can possibly get. Please read what others have said about the services
of ADDsuccess and their coaching experience
Testimonies
Good
luck in making that all-important change
Alcohol & addiction